Voice: solo soprano, string quartet, kbd - False We Hope

Ensemble: multiple versions - solo voice, piano/keyboard, string quartet; three voices, piano/keyboard, string quartet

Duration: 26 minutes

Written for: Eliza Bagg and Attacca Quartet

Premiered: Big Ears Festival, First Baptist Cathedral, Knoxville, Tennessee

Published by: Yes Daedalus Music

Note:

In 2020, while we were all sequestered in our houses, there was this strange dissonance between how scary things were outside, how truly dark and worrisome the future felt, against the smaller, more intimate dramas of our own daily rituals. Some of us were thrown back into close contact with our families, with whose own microdramas we were quickly reacquainted. Sitting at the dinner table every night felt like a kind of constant negotiation, an evaluation: who needed help, who was drifting.

These songs are a product of that time, of conversations with my friends Karen and Carey about faith and family, the ghostly origins of language, and the lonely vigils people keep, together and alone. We discussed the faith that underlies even our most garbled attempts at communication—not just faith in one another, or in a God, but in meaning itself. We wanted the lyrics to represent this ongoing struggle to make ourselves understood, and to mean something to one another.

There’s a violence to these songs, and a fear that comes with navigating unknown waters. But there’s also serenity, a reassurance that comes from ritual, from the complex warmth of a family unit, from our endless desire to connect: to other people, to stories, to something larger than ourselves. To me, these feel like the tools available to us when we reckon with forces outside our control.

Writing this piece felt like shining a light on an invisible structure in a dark room. As the source of light moved, it cast different shadows, slowly revealing itself. I’m so thankful to have worked with such close friends to bring it to life.

Perusal score: solo voice version view here